Embracing the silver lining
They say honesty is the best policy, but I havenít been very honest with you guys lately. Quite frankly, the past few months have been exhausting.
Everyone at the office got sick in early February, and I broke my ankle a week later. I spent seven weeks in a boot, constantly taking it on and off to complete the simplest tasks. It was stressful to go the bathroom or get a glass of water. The pain was out of this world for weeks, but that wasnít the worst part.
My energy was totally depleted. It felt like blowing up a balloon and never having enough breath to finish the job. The balloon kept deflating. I kept deflating. Those of you who have broken bones certainly understand how that feels. There were times where I wished I could be a child again, so my mom would take care of me and all I had to do was rest.
Fortunately, my energy level began to increase when I was cleared to walk without the boot. I had hoped to remove the boot and skip away into the sunset, but thatís not how it happened at all. Over the past few weeks, Iíve been walking like every surface is covered in black ice. If I fall, I stand a good chance of re-injuring myself. That creates a whole other anxiety: Will I ever be able to do things the way I used to? Will I ever feel like myself again?
Much of 2019 has centered around recovery. Though Iíve done my best to have a positive attitude, Iíve had days where all I wanted to do is wallow. Now, I do not like being on the receiving end of pity, especially self-pity. When Iím down, all I can think of is how to recover from it. The problem with this kind of recovery is you canít just snap out of it. It takes time and patience. I am not very patient, if you canít tell. It felt like Iíd be down in the dumps forever, even though I knew that couldnít possibly be true.
Last week, I started to feel good again. An employee at the Crescent Hotel discovered bottles of medical specimens from Dr. Norman Bakerís cancer hospital, and I got to write about it. Then I had an exciting meeting with a local mover and shaker, who has quickly become a friend. Thatís the best part of my job ĖĖ I have the opportunity to connect with so many people Iíd never meet otherwise.
I finished the week writing copy for Eureka Springs Visitor, listening to music and typing away for hours in an empty office. It was a great week and the first time Iíve truly felt happy since February. This week, I am still riding that high. Iím feeling like I can take on challenges that felt overwhelming only a few weeks ago. If thereís any silver lining in working through a stressful situation, thatís it.
Itís the satisfying feeling of being an overcomer ĖĖ†knowing thereís nothing you canít accomplish if you keep plugging away. To those of you who have overcome a difficult situation, I want you to know how awesome you are. We all experience tough times and often fail to appreciate our ability to not only survive but thrive.
Well, Iím certainly appreciating that silver lining, and I hope you are, too!
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Samantha Jones is associate editor for Carroll County Newspapers. Her email address is Citizen.Editor.Eureka@gmail.com