Some mornings, I curse the world while driving to work.
Why do I have to be up this early? Why do those birds think it's appropriate to chirp this early and that loudly? Isn't it kind of tragic that we study the first part of our lives in school only to graduate from that and into a work schedule? For the love of Lost, the best television show of all time, when do we get relief?
If you can't tell, I am not a morning person. I pity my boyfriend for having to deal with it, as he has left the room several times in the a.m. after me grunting loudly and throwing pillows at him. I've even gotten side-eye from the cat on several occasions, which is pretty impressive considering he sleeps almost 90 percent of the day.
I'm not sure why I hate mornings so much. It may have something to do with being raised by an overly enthusiastic morning person; my mother gets up 30 minutes early just so she can spend more time listening to music and putting on her makeup. I will never understand her.
She never had to drag me out of bed, but she took away television privileges several times when I refused to move in the morning. She once threatened me with a belt, quickly realizing that it would be better to target my television obsession instead.
She was right. Once my TV time was restricted, I started moving from bed much faster. Please don't think I'm implying that I faked being a morning person to appease her. No, I still dragged my feet and grunted and threw pillows at no one in particular. However, I did all this while putting on clothes and brushing my hair.
As I grew older, I began getting up on my own so that I could drive myself to school. Then I went to college and had no one to call me and scream, "Get up, Samantha!" The real world came after that, and now I get up at 5:30 a.m. some mornings without complaining too much.
My boyfriend would still say I complain a lot, but he doesn't have work until 10 a.m. most days so he can shut his well-rested mouth.
So, I'm sure you're asking, how did I start waking up on time and maintaining some control over my emotions?
Coffee, my friends. Coffee is a wonderful thing. I probably love it more than I love some of my family members. The first thing I do when I get to work is check the fax and make a cup of coffee; once I've ingested half the cup, I'm pretty good to go for the rest of the day.
My mother hasn't said she's surprised I'm managing to get up early, but maybe that's because she discovered coffee long before I did. I really thought I'd become a morning person the older I got; it turns out I just didn't understand the healing power of caffeine until I started this job last August.
I've even started to come around to the taste of black coffee. It's gotten to the point that I request my coffee as strong as possible without sugar or cream.
In related news, I think I'm turning into a monster.
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Samantha Jones is a reporter for the Carroll County News. Her email address is CCNNews@cox-internet.com